Now, I don’t want this post to be about New Year’s resolutions and all that jazz. I’m not going to sit here and write off a list of different habits I say I’m going to make or break – when it never actually happens. But this is going to be a post about how I am planning on changing my life for the better – whether this is focusing on my health, career, relationships or general life. This year I want to focus much more on myself. I want to stop saying I’m going to do something, but actually get up and DO it.
Throughout 2018, I put on a lot of weight. I blamed it on my poor mental health, my laziness and the lack of cooking at home. This year I want to try and reverse that. I want to become a healthier, happier version of myself. I’ve struggled so much with my weight over the last year – getting angry that clothes don’t fit me, cancelling photoshoots because I didn’t feel worthy of being in front of a camera and breaking down in tears about my weight to my boyfriend which I shouldn’t be burdening him with. I’ve realised that I have such self-destructive behaviour and I find it so easy to shift the blame onto something else without realising that I am the only one really, at the root of the cause. So without going all “new year, new me” on you all – I’m not going to try and punish myself and do stupid fad diets that always fail or say I’m going to the gym every morning before work because I know that’s not going to happen. I am, however, going to make a more conscious effort of what goes into my body and how I am looking after it. I’ve seen so many people talking about keto lifestyles and it may only be tempting me because I get to eat cheese – but who doesn’t wanna diet and still get to eat cheese?! This so-called ‘diet’ focuses on putting the right fats and protein into your body so that you go into a state of ketosis whereby your body uses fat for fuel as opposed to the sugars you would constantly shove down your throat. So we’ll see how this goes…
I never thought I’d be the kind of person who would want to go travelling. The thought of carrying a heavy rucksack halfway around the world just doesn’t appeal to me, and hey, maybe that’s just my lazy nature. But I do want to see more of the world. I absolutely love visiting new destinations, learning about different cultures and basking in the sun. So I’m making a promise to myself that I am going to travel more. I always find myself searching for holidays or pinning away lots of different tropical destinations and the wanderlust is so real. Something that has hit me though, is the fact I’m back in full-time employment. Going on holiday every month isn’t going to be an option. But I do want to make a conscious effort to see as much of the world as I can this year. Whether that means being more frugal with my money to save up for an amazing two week holiday, travelling to different cities for weekend breaks or using my bank holidays efficiently to make the most out of my free time.
If you’ve been here a while then you will know I’ve been battling my mental health for quite some time. This year I want to make my mental health my number one priority. I want to read more and exercise my mind. I want to practise mindfulness and start a gratitude journal to help me document my thoughts. I want to be strong enough to cut toxic people out of my life as this played a massive part in my confidence dropping and anxiety increasing last year. I want to be able to spend less time on my phone, and more time with my loved ones – just being in the moment and enjoying life. I currently spend an average of 6 hours per day on my phone and that’s more than a whole day out of my week just sat scrolling. I need to learn to listen to my body more and know that it’s okay not to be okay and allow myself to rest. To stop putting pressure on myself and understand that my journey is different from everyone else’s.
Do you have any resolutions or goals this year? I’d love to know.
Love, Aysh x